Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
