Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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