Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
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