Kiss
Puke
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
There r osticjed everywhere
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
