Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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