Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
