i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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