This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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