hotel room ftw
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
