tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
