it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
