So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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