yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Green mimosas i think yes
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
