yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
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