Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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