The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
