I hope mine doesn't look like that
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
