it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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