You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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