saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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