yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
