I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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