Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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