you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
