I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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