We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
