i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
