Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
