woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
