worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Randomize
