Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
