Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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