My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
