I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
