covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
