god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
