he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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