I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
