yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
