Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
there was a trapeze. enough said
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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