My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
