I saw his package. It spoke to me.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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