Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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