Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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