YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
