no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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