There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
its liver damage thursday
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize