Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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