I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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