Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize